“Pain Of All Women” The first few years after marriage were very good. There was love between us, intimacy, and every little thing that made our relationship special. But gradually everything started changing. His work increased, and so did our distance. He would return home late at night, exhausted, and I would just wait. Every night would be spent thinking that maybe today he will talk to me, hug me lovingly. But nothing like that happened.
Initially it seemed that all this was just for a few days and then everything would be fine. But weeks, months and then years passed. Whenever I tried to tell him, he used to avoid it but one day I gathered courage and told him that I need you, I need your body. That night I cried a lot, wondering what was my fault, what did I do wrong? I talked about my rights and got four abuses in return and every time I felt that I was left alone in my relationship. Perhaps my needs and my feelings did not matter to him.
To get out of this loneliness, I started looking for new ways for myself. I started meeting my friends outside, going to kitty parties, and there I met some friends who were struggling with loneliness like me, Then to get out of that loneliness, they brought me in contact with many boys who are called gigolos, who fulfill physical needs and take money. My friends, I told you everything that it is safe, it does not hurt you, Like many women like me, I also came in contact with them and gradually I realized that I could get that happiness only in this outside world. Which I was not able to find at home. There people understood me and shared in my joy and happiness. I got to hear things that my husband probably never said.
In these moments I felt a new peace. These people used to give me the love and attention that I desperately needed. Some people started understanding me, understood my loneliness. While spending time with him, I started finding some happiness in my incomplete life.
Now this outside world had become my real world. I had no complaints against anyone there, there was no expectation that I would need to convince anyone here too. These people accepted me the way I am.
Maybe this was not right, but the peace and happiness that I needed at that time, I was getting outside only. Now instead of keeping my loneliness within myself, I am living it openly in front of the world.”
Is it right to live suffocated or…
Spending some safe moments with someone for your happiness?